The last two weeks were emotionally draining. On Thursday I think we all felt numb. We missed Lucy. It was difficult not to think of her when her things, including her Frisbee, were all around the house. Her dog dish sat next to the fridge. Her blankets were spread around our room to accommodate her restlessness. The blender we used to mix her special food was half full in the fridge. I knew it would be difficult to say good-bye to her but for some reason I wasn't expecting the range of emotions I felt. Mixed in with the sadness was a little relief. Relief in not having to worry every moment of every day about how Lucy was doing. Relief at being able to think about something other than when her next drug dose was due. Relief at knowing that we wouldn't have to go back to the vet anytime soon. And then, of course, guilt at feeling relief. Mostly we went through the motions. I admit, I stayed in bed most of the day mindlessly watching TV. Rob puttered around the yard and the kids entertained themselves by climbing on the roof in a Nerf gun battle.
And then we woke up on Friday and things didn't feel so bad. Of course, we'll continue to miss her and the sadness will come in waves but Friday was normal. Probably better than normal. We had two events that needed our attention but both were very small. Seriously so small that the preparation for the events took longer than setting up the events. We set up a stage at Hawks in the afternoon and then set up a speaker with a mic at the school carnival that my sister organizes. And then we just hung out. It was a very normal family thing to do and we usually don't do normal family things. It was kind of nice. . .
We ended our normal evening by watching fireworks in the rain at Hawk's Stadium feeling thankful that all of this wet sound equipment wasn't ours:
Even tearing down the stage in the rain didn't seem so bad.
It was a good day.
And somehow that surprised me. . .
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