January 2, 2015

I've been waffling back and forth between making big (huge) resolutions and not making any resolutions at all.  Maybe set some goals. Not good enough!! Big (huge) resolutions!  NO!  That only comes with disappointment.  Write down a few things you can shoot for, you know, maybe go back to school in the fall, maybe turn the backyard into a relaxing haven, stop biting your nails.  Post a picture everyday!!  Make a vision board!! 

All of these things have run through my head plus a zillion other thoughts about how I want things to be different in 2015.  And yesterday, the very first day of 2015, I did none of those things. 

Instead, I woke up in a hotel with Gloria and her two friends feeling thankful that we work with people whose generosity and friendship leads to things like free hotel suites.  And free breakfast buffets.  And then I did absolutely nothing to pack up all of the gear from the New Year's Eve show.  Not one cable coiled, not one case pushed into the truck, not one subwoofer touched any part of my body.  And I felt no guilt.  And then I went home and took a nap.  And played games with my kids.  And then I stopped by and visited Dale and his sweet family at Pizza Hut because they were in town for a couple of hours before flying back to Maryland.  And he hugged me and told me that he's proud of me.  He was our business partner way back in the beginning and he knows where I'm at. 

When we got home I ate two bowls of homemade noodles that my father-in-law made just for me.  I shared with the rest of the family but they were just for me. 

We played Ticket to Ride in the evening, all four of us.  In my new office / game room / exercise room / haven. 

When I finally went to bed, I heard the laughter of my kids coming from the living room where they were fully engaged in a two lap top game of Minecraft.  Until at least 3 a.m.  And I smiled every time the laughter was loud enough to wake me up. 

So, I don't feel guilty for not setting goals or writing things down.  I've been doing the work.  I've been making the changes.  Little by little I've been making good changes.  And what I'm finding is the most important change I'm making is to choose happiness.  People matter.  Time is short.  Life is good and I have good things to be thankful for and to look forward to.